Week 8 - How to Become a Rock Star

Week 8

Enjoy!

"How to Become a Rock Star"

Lights, Camera...all cost money

Though this is a low-budget production, things have started to add up.

Expenses:

$8.50 - chips, salsa, cups, soda (for Foot in the Mouth)
$15.00 - Big-ass Clamp-Light + 200w light bulb (so far, only used on tomorrow's "Rock Star")

Expenses forseen in the not-too-distant future:

-Another light + lightbulb ($15.00)
-Diffusion Sheets to make the lights not so damn bright ($15-$25)
-Microphone for Camera ($25-$400)
-Final Cut Pro (Free? - $1200)

Coming soon: An easy way for those driven to the site via clever innuendo to donate money to the cause.

Some body rockin' knockin' pop blockin' the what?

With all this hullabaloo about innuendos and the like, I've decided to become more focused on creating a quality product, and by "product" I mean "nude calendar."

Seriously, this may be the best idea we've ever had. It's like we just skipped ahead and got a degree in marketing in a day and a half.

We should pay ourselves more than we do, we deserve it.

On another note, our steady climb to the top of the $%*@^ -in-cheek molehill is that "somehow" the name of this website has leaked out to the kids at the school I work at. So:

Either there are a lot of kids googling the name 'Lawrence Long" (which is not as cool as you'd think - it's grade school)

Or

I do not have the maturity necessary to be in charge of children.

Let's see how the numbers rise and let the chips fall where they may

The Casting Couch is on Top

If you've been keeping track of YouTube views of our shorts (who hasn't?), you know that three of our shorts crossed the 100 views mark last week, with "The Casting Couch" out-pacing them all.

Yes, "Post No Bills" is gaining fast, but we'll see if it has legs, or it was just a sprint and now it's lying on the grass, gasping for breath.

No, there will not be updates on every milestone (but 500, 1000, 2000 are important numbers too, you know).

Since "The Casting Couch" is unanimously NOT our best short, there are only two possible explanations for its popularity:

1. A sexually suggestive titles simply gets more hits
2. I'm in the short, thus giving it the "Eric Bump."

Explanation two falls flat when we see that "Hide-n-Seek" is the LEAST popular short, and I'm in that as well. Damn.

And so from now on our titles will have some sort of innuendo subtly hidden within. Stay tuned, and see if you can spot our clever wordplay!

Coming Friday: How to Knock Boots like a Rock Star (and by "Knock Boots" we mean "Have Sex.")

That one is free. The next ones will be harder. Much hard...er...I mean more difficult!

How to be a Rock Star

(Or is Rockstar one word? Real Rock Stars wouldn't ask such questions, I know...)

This is yesterday:

I wrote a short.

Called Lawrence.

We filmed it.

---

Thank god we are neighbors, or weeks like this would be tough.

Coming Friday: How to be a Rock Star - A short film / tutorial (not really)

Short Films 101 - How To Make A Short Film... By Frederick Levy

Lawrence called me not once but twice tonight while I was in the theater watching Reprise (recommend). I called him as soon as I got out.

Me: What's up?
La: We got our first piece of fan mail.
Me: What?
La: Picked up a package addressed to "The Short-a-Week Project" that was at our mailboxes.
Me: Strange. Who's it from?
La: Cathy Morrison or something?
Me: That sounds sorta familiar.

I dropped by his apartment on my way home, and yes, it turned out it was from someone that I knew and not an anonymous fan that had somehow tracked down where we live. Inside the very professional package was Short Films 101: How to Make a Short Film and Launch Your Filmmaking Career by Frederick Levy.

Lawrence was a bit disappointed that it wasn't a crazed teen or famed producer, and I was a little confused - is "filmmaking" a word? - but technically it was still the first thing we've received addressed to The Short-a-Week Project.

So, thanks Carrie. For the book. On how to make short films. One question though:

What are you trying to say? We just made a short inspired by the French New Wave cinema, in case you hadn't noticed.

Oh you had noticed? Hmm. Ok, so we know what you are trying to say, and all we can say is...thanks. We'll read it. I've been looking for a book like this. Seriously.

And if anyone else wants to send fan mail (or "fan gifts" such as Final Cut Pro), you know the address. (Or do you?)

Week 7 - Defense d'Afficher (Post No Bills)

The Short-a-Week Project brings you the short film "Defense d'Afficher" (Post No Bills).

Inspired by the works of Eric Rohmer and the French New Wave cinema comes a unique vision of one man's quest to defy society through a rebellious act.

Running Time 2min, 14sec
Black and White
French with English Subtitles


Defense d'Afficher (Post No Bills)

French Titles are tricky

Turns out that "Post No Bills" is actually translated "Defense d'Afficher"

And that it was already the title of a short film shot in 1896. I kid you not.

Lawrence Speaks French

Lawrence came over to read the subtitles. Turns out when he said "hell yeah I can read French!" (my interpretation of a text message that said "yes" to my question of "can you read French?") he meant that he had only taken a year of French in school, and that was a long time ago.

E = me
L = Lawrence

E: So here's the script, just read the highlighted parts, kinda sexy, kinda serious.
L: Wait, let me read through it first
E: Dude, I thought you knew French.
L: I don't know it that well.
E: We'll do it line by line. So just practice that first line while I set up the voice over.
(a minute later)
E: Ready?
L: I guess.

And then we did it, with the only direction from me coming with "try to make it sound like you speak French."

How'd it turn out? Check out Week 7's "Post No Bills" and decide for yourself.

Security Trailers, Planks, Shots, Wardrobe Changes, and a Short Film Called "Post No Bills"

To clarify even more, here's and addendum to Lawrence's post about what went down that fateful Sunday night/Monday morning.

Eric was back at the apartment by 12:05. He has a text-message from Lawrence at 12:06am. Lawrence likely spent the next 30 minutes deciding what to wear (see post). He then came over. By that time, it was nearly a quarter to one.

There were shots. Oh yes, there were shots.

Eric did not think the trailer was spooky. He thought the possibility that a deranged serial killer was hunkered down inside the trailer - fresh from killing the security guard - waiting for punks to mess with the construction site nearby; he thought that was a little spooky.

Je ne sais what?

I'm looking forward to our little art piece. I think you are too. Yeah you are.

The honest truth is that even though we decided to film only after Eric got back from a concert at 12:45 am and he made (asked?) me to do a shot with him beforehand, the thing we didn't catch on film was how eerily spooky we thought the security trailer on street behind us to be. Already getting ideas, just not sure how legal they are.

Piece-de-resistance-out

Post No Bills (De Ne Pas Poster des Annonces)

So, "Post No Bills" (De Ne Pas Poster des Annonces) is turning out to be a black and white French film; thus the parenthetical French title. Confused? Perhaps a text message exchange from last night will clear things up.

Key:
A is for actor (Lawrence)
D is for director (me)

D: You up? Let's film.
A: Bills?
D: Yeah.
A: Yeah, let's do it. Be there in 10?
D: Okay.
A: What should I wear?
D: Clothes.
A: Like what line of clothes. What's the story with this guy, we decide on that?
D: He's a rebel.

Lawrence doesn't respond.

D: But a reluctant rebel.
A: Hmmm.
D: And he's gay. I mean, blind. (A reference to this video that apparently Lawrence had not seen)
A: Really?
D: No, not really. Just wear anything and come over

We then shot it, to uh, mixed results. We'll see what we can do with this croissant of a film.

Site Design Change - From Minima to TicTac

Some of you may have noticed that the videos (such as Foot in the Mouth) did not play that well on the site. Or they played but had a frozen bar of video running up the right side of the screen in a horizontal fashion. I know I noticed.

For a while (20 minutes) it was a mystery. Then I changed the template. Problem solved. For now.

Hope you like our new look. And if there are technical difficulties with it, keep it to yourself.

Kidding! Let us know!

Thanks.

Week 6 - Foot in the Mouth

The Short-a-Week Project proudly presents: Foot in the Mouth

Foot in the Mouth and Future Shorts

Coming tomorrow: Foot in the Mouth. It will be delicious.

After tomorrow? Good question. Possibilities:

1. "Dishwasher" is shot and edited with music by Streets on Fire. BUT it is really short and well, strange.

2. Post No Bills - Hopefully Lawrence and I will shoot this sometime this week. Tonight? Not tonight?

3. Harassing Matt Hill for sequels to "Foot in the Mouth." Yeah, it's that good.

4. A short about shorts. - This was a suggestion from a friend. Not bad, not bad. All we need now is a story, characters, actors...

Seriously though, we really do appreciate any ideas...

A Side Project - Deep Creek Hot Springs Video

Sometimes, I do non-fiction.

By that, I mean I take my video camera on trips. Yeah, I'm that guy. Sorry.

Here's an edited video (with music!) of a recent trip to Deep Creek Hot Springs by way of Bowen Ranch, up near Apple Valley (CA). Enjoy!

The Making of a Short Film - Foot in the Mouth

Yesterday, we shot Matt Hill's "Foot in the Mouth." Here are excerpts from some of the conversations:

Eric: Ready to shoot?
Lawrence: I'm glad you have confidence in my skills, but you just gave me the script ten minutes ago.
Eric: So...want to do a read through?
Lawrence: Yeah.

Chad: Are you going to block the shots?
Eric: Block?
Chad: You know, blocking.
Eric: Oh, you mean tell you where to stand and move so the shots line up on different takes?
Chad: Yeah.
Eric: No. Just remember where you were.
Chad: Okay...

Howard: I think I missed my cue.

Kenna: Was that good?
Eric: Perfect. Except next time stand on the other side of him.

Chad: Is this your lighting?
Eric: Only until I can get to Home Depot.

Howard: Did I miss my cue again?
Eric: Yeah.

Eric: Pause before you say, "and wasps." It'll make it funny.
Chad: Gotcha.
Eric: Okay, let's do it again. You're at a party, it's fun, but Chad's pissed off and Lawrence can't say the right thing. And...ACTION. (Lawrence's cell phone rings) And...CUT.

...

Coming Friday: Foot in the Mouth
Starring: Lawrence Long and Introducing (to the Short-a-Week Project) Chad Kennedy, Kenna Knost, and Howard Padwa
Written by: Matt Hill
Directed and Edited by: Eric Myers
Music by Putnam Hall
Chips by Mission
Red Cups by Dixie

The results of our poll

The people have spoken, and our best short is...

Not a Girl

AND

I, Alien

Yep, it's a tie. Thanks for voting! We'll have to find some way next time to prevent this.

Tomorrow we film Matt Hill's "Foot in the Mouth" starring Lawrence and...other actors! And one of them is a girl! Amazing.

Week 5 - Hide-n-Seek

If you bet we wouldn't make it five weeks, you lost.

Hide-n-Seek


Thanks again to our anonymous helper, and to Jerkules for the music.

Check out Jerkules on his MySpace http://www.myspace.com/jerkulesashimself

And check out "anonymous" everywhere you turn in this cold, impersonal world...

Tomorrow's Short and the Future

Tomorrow's short film is a marvel of modern editing. And by "marvel" I mean it's better than the last one.

Following tomorrow, we'll need to shoot another short, like, pronto. There's a backup short in the can, but it's really just there in case we can't film one this week.

We have a script (Thanks Matt!) but need actors. Lawrence is in, and Chad might be too. And Matt? We'll see if we can get Matt. He's good. Check him out as Alfred in Dr. Miracles

Seriously.

Which short is our best short so far?

We're four weeks into the project and four films in the...laptop? Please vote on the poll on the right and let us know which short you liked the best. (You don't have to login or anything, just click!)

This will help us figure out what we're doing right, and what we're doing oh so wrong...

Week 4 - The Casting Couch

The creators would like to thank the mysterious person who worked the camera, as well as Apple loops, for their pre-set running bass lines and funky beats. Oh, we couldn't have done it without the funky beats.

Without further ado, here is "The Casting Couch" starring Lawrence Long (big surprise).

(Further ado) Turn up the volume on your computer and enjoy!




Compliments? Complaints? Questions? Drop a comment.